By Navin Chandra Joshi

 

Bore: A person who, when asked what time it was, starts explaining the origin and development of watches.

Classic: A book that is praised by all but never read.

Communist: One who always aspired but could not become a capitalist.

Consultant: One who always consults others to keep his/her profession going.

Corruption: A way of life secretly adopted by all but publicly denounced.

Discretion: A husband shouting ‘No, No, No… when his wife is out of the town.

Doctor: One who sustains himself on ill, pill and bill.

Economist: A person who can paint a rosy picture for you and then can explain later why it turned red.

Experience: It is a comb one gets after turning bald.

Fire Tender: One that reaches the site to destroy whatever is left from getting burnt.

Freedom Fighters: All husbands. 

Heart Specialist: One who charges you for every extra heart beat he/she assures you of.

Ideal Couple: Adam & Eve (since none had anyone else to compare him/her with).

Intuition: A wife’s No because the husband says anything.

Marriage: A date on which the man loses his Bachelor’s degree and the woman attains her Masters.

Optimist: A person who buys a solar cooker in Cherapunji.

Pessimist: One who sees O at the end of zero instead of at the start of opportunity.

Politician: One who wears khadi all his life to bequeath furs and minks for the family.

Silence (in a lady’s common room): When there is an announcement that the oldest would speak first.

Sixteen: An age that takes years for the girls to cross.

Wife: One in charge of all the affirmatives and all the negatives.